Natalia Laconza: “I spent the day surrounded by men and wanted to be surrounded by girls” | culture

To Natalia Lacunza (Pamplona, ​​23), the cute contestant in victory operation who did not win the TV competition but whose only name Spain can remember from its version (the first after the “Amaya Nuclear Bomb”) loves to go to the electronic dark dance and drum and bass To your favorite nightclub. This is what he shows on his new album, It must be me He’s touring Spain, full of digital textures. While picking up a piece sushi Passing by the revolving bar at Akihibara, a quirky Japanese restaurant in Madrid inspired by the neighborhood Geeky Par excellence in Tokyo, where fans interrupt her from time to time to ask for selfies, she says that “when she was young,” her mother played Carla Bruni’s album for her. Two decades later, her tastes had evolved, in every possible way, to such an extent that they did not recognize themselves: “When you are young you assume so many things within you that you must later disassemble them without a hitch.”

I ask. Didn’t you like dancing before?

Answer. I have always loved it! But now I’m discovering the club’s culture, which although it doesn’t seem very safe, is quite the opposite. There are some rules you have to follow strictly, very specific, and once you get past them, they send you home. Since I was a very midget, I dreamed of being a dancer in musicals. When I talked about it, some mom of a friend would always come up and say, “Yeah, but what do you really want to be?” Let’s see, madam, first of all, don’t ask a nine-year-old girl what she wants to be when she grows up, and second, don’t treat my dream as if it were illegitimate. Then over time I realized I hadn’t really imagined anything else for myself, and even as I started going to university, my instinct told me I should leave there.

s. ejaculate?

R was found. Well, when I arrived, I thought: “I’ll continue here with two newscasts.” I saw people who went to class and didn’t recognize anyone at all.

s. It’s strange that despite the clarity of his profession, he said it when he finished victory operation She felt that people liked her “for nothing”.

R was found. It’s not just a format that really boosts your creativity. People are starting to get to know you a bit by the time Big Brother shows up and you don’t show your credit and integrity. So when I got out, I thought I should prematurely earn all I had. Then I started wondering if that was really true because I didn’t feel overtly beautiful or incredibly talented. I tend to sabotage yourself and you freak out. I think it is an integral part of my DNA.

s. Did they support her at home?

R was found. My parents supported me a lot in my intention to dedicate myself to music, but although I’ve always been a very nice girl, very educated, and always got very good grades, there was also a lot of expectation from me. Suddenly, it turned out that I did not have a specific sexual orientation, because I am bisexual, and this manifested itself in a general picture that was different from what was expected of me. This is where things can get messy, because you start to realize that you’re not enough…

s. On the other hand, a very feminine feel.

R was found. Yes, “I have to play a part.” When I was a kid, I no longer had a very clear identity, I dressed like a boy, like an eccentric boy and said very happily, “I look like Tarzan, I’m going to take off my earrings.” When we were playing, I was always the father, the brother, the father… When I started to be a little more aware of gender roles and see what I had to do as a woman, it caught my eye at a time in my life when I wasn’t formed yet.

s. Who helped you make the great change?

R was found. Well, great therapist, it was hard for me to find him, I can’t believe. The first thing I went to was an older man and I had the impression that he wouldn’t understand things about girls that I was ashamed to tell him. He told me in the first session: “What you have to do is to be glad to meet you, it is the only thing you need, because you can have what you want. Trust is valuable.” And I thought, That’s why I go to the library and buy a book Mr. Fabulous. You have to trust one’s instinct more because often they tell you that you are crazy and then it turns out that you were right.

s. How is your group made up of only girls?

R was found. Well, I’m sick of seeing little pop girls accompanied by studio musicians who’ve been doing this their whole lives and going in different trucks. I said to myself: “I want to Rock campI spent the day surrounded by men and wanted to be surrounded by girls my age and thought: If it is in my power, why shouldn’t I? And I did it, but not for a political question but for a practical and almost selfish question, to be at ease. When I met them they were Turning Point: I realized that there are good people in the world who would genuinely love me for who I am.They opened my eyes to happiness.

s. Are you saying you are young He woke up With “environmental concern”?

R was found. The truth is that I am very disappointed with the system in general. I’m so concerned about LGTBIQ rights, of course, and of course I’m so concerned about climate change, that sometimes I can’t even think about it. But I think before giving an opinion, I should read more books. What would I say to a man who has 50,000 factories and controls the world?

s. You have argued that the culture of abolition was born out of a sense of powerlessness towards systematic gender abuse. Do you agree with yourself?

R was found. completely. Justice does not work as one thinks. You can’t calmly talk about what you want or tell something that happened to you, because they are suing you. Or they start sending you threatening emails.

s. Why do you think there are so few girls in gangs?

R was found. This is starting to change. There but they are given less noise and less support than the industry. We also have a culture of shyness and humility, and are more inwardly engaged. Although I think if you’re a 14-year-old boy it’s easier to start playing drums than if you’re a girl, because you see all these bands and get excited. We lacked references.

s. And are they just as important as they say?

R was found. Of course they are very important! For example, what Amaia did was an inspiration when it came to taking on my own project. Or maybe I wouldn’t have had so many conflicts in my sex and love life if I didn’t feel disgusted when I was young and had my 20 year old bisexual aunt cue on TV.

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